Excruciation

The thought keeps on coming back to me "What made Jesus' death the most painful?" Crucifixion may be very uncommon now, and was even removed from the Roman Empire in 337, yet it still happens in places such as Saudi Arabia. What made Jesus' crucifixion more painful than any other human's extreme case(s) of suffering?

My initial answer would be something along the lines of: "Jesus was separated from the Father, and was the only human to truly go through Hell on earth." Was Jesus separated from God, the father? 

John 10:28-30 says ...and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.

If Jesus and the Father are one, than how could they be separated? That being said, there is also the verse in Matthew 27 that reads About the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” that is, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?”

I highly doubt that Jesus was simply being melodramatic, and that it only felt like God had forsaken him. Jesus was forsaken by God. Why? Jesus went through Hell so that we could avoid it. When I say Hell I do not mean suffering on earth - our suffering only equates to being shards of Hell. And as Romans 8:18 tells us, For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

But if Jesus went through Hell for us, than why do we suffer at all? Is Hell the origin of suffering? If it is, does that mean that it is sinful to suffer? Does that mean that it is sinful to feel pain?

How can earth be like Heaven (Matthew 6:10) when we suffer? Revelation 21:3 seems to suggest that suffering is not present in Heaven ... And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.”

Earth will never be like Heaven. It just cannot be ... can it? Is suffering outside of God's will? 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 says:

For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God; and that no man transgress and defraud his brother in the matter because the Lord is the avenger in all these things, just as we also told you before and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but in sanctification. So, he who rejects this is not rejecting man but the God who gives His Holy Spirit to you.

Nowhere in this does it say that suffering is outside of God's will. I suppose it should be quite obvious to me that pain is not outside of God's will, since Jesus was crucified on the cross. But my real question ... is it wrong to suffer now? Is it wrong to feel pain now? I have such trouble picturing God having sympathy for us - I doubt that God still hurts for us, that God still understands. If Jesus really did suffer the most painful death, than why would God feel sorry for us now? Why should he? I find all of this to be quite spiritually crippling. I fear that God does not want us to feel, that God has no sympathy for our hurting, that it is overly melodramatic to say that we are suffering. Perhaps we don't even really suffer at all. God may just be shaking his head at all of us. He does not care, he just wants us to get over it. Simple as that. I do not want to believe that, but a part of me does believe that.

It seems like the question has already been answered. SUFFERING IS NOT FREAKING WRONG, GRAHAM. IT WAS NOT WRONG THEN, IT IS NOT WRONG NOW, IT WILL NOT BE WRONG IN THE FUTURE. STOP IT!

I have trouble accepting that as an answer though. I have such trouble believing that God understands, that God cares, that we have felt enough pain to say that we are suffering. Is suffering just having pity on ourselves? Is that what God thinks? Does he want us to be emotionally neutral at all times?  I do not know, I just cannot bring myself to believe in a God that is still caring. What has stopped me from reaching that point?