Monday 24 March 2014

Peter's Floor

Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because whoever suffers in the body is done with sin. As a result, they do not live the rest of their earthly lives for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God.

As I reflect in dim solitude, I merely fail. In what ways do I fail? I fail to expand upon this remnant of scripture, or rather, this remnant of the voice of God. Though I have heard about the idea of suffering for Christ before, it seems as though I have come to the place where I am truly listening. Listening to the idea? Perhaps. Let these words shake me! I feel like I am close to shaking. My mind imagines a certain desperation for extreme feelings. I do not feel enough! What am I trying to say? I suppose that my question to God would be "can your children absolutely overcome suffering while remaining on the earth?" I am unsure if I would like to completely overcome suffering. Why do I have an attraction toward suffering? I detest physical suffering, but I cannot say with a clear conscience that I am so opposed to the other types of suffering. Perhaps I have not truly suffered before, in any way? I may have been close to suffering physically, but what are the standards by which suffering is measured? Suffering and God are two propositions which are of interest to me, but it seems as though I have not experienced either of them. And I was close to making that mistake - again. Do you remember? Hint: when I asked that question on March 20, 2014. I was close to mistaking my interest toward suffering for experiencing suffering, and I was close to mistaking my thoughts about God for God himself. No matter how many times I leap toward Heaven's floor, I keep on looking to a sky which holds me under.

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