What exactly are you gravitating toward? The idea of being "yourself" or "individualistic" seems completely irrational to me. You are so blatantly opposed to the idea of conformity that you choose to conform to the idea of opposition. Then again, opposition is more than just an idea, for it can also come through action and the same goes for conformity. But did you, in and of yourself, create opposition? If not, then where does opposition come from? Where does conformity come from? As far as I am concerned, it is absolutely impossible for somebody to not be influenced by external forces. Nobody has lived in a world where they were completely alone. Even when Adam was apart from Eve, God existed, light existed, darkness existed, water existed and so forth (Genesis chapter 1). In terms of human existence, "uniqueness" is a Utopian idea. What exactly are you running away from?