Saturday, 17 May 2014
Why does every god look like the same god to me? I had never thought about that until this evening - every god looks like the same god. The gods merely drag me by the feet and lend me over to melancholy. If you will only worship what ceases to disappoint you, then you will find nothing to worship. If I worship humans, I worship flesh and blood - close and fragile. If I worship a supernatural being, I worship what is incomprehensible - distant and eternal. Worshiping humans feels awe-inspiring. And when other humans worship me? Well, that makes for a good day. O God, I understand that it is vanity. I understand that the feelings are fleeting. But do you understand that I am so empty without their praises? Why do my idols refuse to idolize me? It is because I have turned them into statues. They cannot idolize me because my praises have immobilized them. It would be foolish for me to ask why idols cannot properly take the place which you hold. But God, why I am unable to worship you endlessly and bask in endless awe?