Why do we suffer?

Why do we suffer? I have heard different responses to this question, but I have never exactly heard an answer. I have never heard of an absolute solution to the question. Or at least, I have not felt the effects of the absolute solution. I could say it is God. I feel quite confident in that answer. But how do I feel confident in the answer when I have not felt the effects of what I perceive to be the answer? Reality and feeling are two different things. Yes, God is Reality, and God is Eternal, and Feeling is Finite, so Reality must be Eternal. I have not found an absolute solution for myself. Well, I have not felt it. Or maybe I have? Anyway, I am distant from the feeling tonight. This is more than a case of wondering; it is a search for healing during times of despair. But do I want the suffering to end? In some ways, I do. I HATE ANXIETY. But I do not have such a problem with sadness. No, with sadness come calmness. With sadness comes the quiet. I am fearful of sadness ending. Maybe it is not sadness in and of itself that I am fearful of losing, but what I obtain through sadness: the calmness. I may very well be afraid of losing sadness for that reason. I think I want to be calm. But I do not want to find peace where the others find peace. I desire something more esoteric, in theory. Who said I was not lying though?